attacks of opportunity

Been there. It has happened. It's rare, certainly, but mainly because true grief is rare in heroic genres.

And yeah, it's embarrassing, a little... but grief is embarrassing in real life, too. Seeing someone grieve makes us uncomfortable, and that is the root of embarrassment.

I've had two experiences that I would call truly "emotional" during an RPG session. Neither were embarassing*. They both happened in long-term groups among players that were close friends outside the game. Both were serious, tear-inducing scenes.

But in my recent forays into Nar gaming (in the past couple of years or so) I've noticed a big increase in "emotional play" in general. Given the way Nar games work, they tend to revolve more around the thoughts and feelings of the real people playing, and I tend to just "feel more" when playing them.

It's like the difference between watching Breaking the Waves and Die Hard. They each have their place.

*The embarassing game was the Everway playtest in which we had to get up and "dance in the style of your character's background." And we all did it. I hope there's not a video of that somewhere.

Yeah, I've had a tear-enducing scene back in college - the group was smaller than normal as not everyone could make it to the game, but by the end of one scene one of the players was very emotionally stressed-out.

Too, I've been in Ravenloft games run by a very talented GM/ST/etc where a number of us were seriously scared, frightened, terrified... and had to remind ourselves that it was only a game.

But yeah, I do think that it is highly dependent on the group, the circumstances, and the like.

Personally, I use the emotional attachment of the players to their characters as a sign that the game is going well. If the players have emotional investment and get mad, scared, angry, sad, grief-stricken etc about the events of the game it is a good sign - I know that they care!

I think it comes from my background in coaching sports - I know that if a player gets mad or upset a little bit (but not enough to be disruptive to the team) then it means that they have their head in the game - they are motivated and focused.

Laughter and joy are also emotions that I really focus on too. I have seen players giving each other high 5s at the end of sessions, spontaneous cheers and applause. One of my players played a bard that wrote a poem chronicling a difficult session that moved a few to tears and was really emotional for all of us. It also capped off a year long campaign and was the last session for that group, which might have had something to do with the emotional outpouring.

I have to admit that I have never been embarassed about the emotion that people feel in the game. It seems a bit strange to me, but I also play with a male and female group where most of the players have known each other for a number of years (up to 20 or so) so the environment is supportive and safe for everyone.